Make Friends in Early Retirement

So, I’ll be the first to admit that as an introvert and I don’t focus much on building friendships outside of my very close-knit group. This is something I plan to change slightly in retirement as we set down roots. However, not immediately. Immediately, we want to be a little nomadic – little to no roots. But, after that… then what? As we relocateteam-motivation-teamwork-together-53958.jpeg to another area we’ll want to throw those olive branches out at least a bit and meet some like-minded people, but where will we find them?  I remember in 8th grade I went to a new school and wore the constant question of “will you by my friend?” in my eyes. It was a terrible time to move and try to build new friendships. But, now I’ll be in my early 40s, with our only daughter in college and my very best friend at my side – I’ve grown a lot since that insecure 8th grader walking petrified through the halls. Though, we will be living a kind of “college” lifestyle (poor and fun!) but will probably like the outlet of other people too. We have found that sometimes living a little more frugally can impact the relationships we have with those around us – especially in our high cost area. We have no interest in keeping up with the Joneses. Here is how we plan to reconnect with our roots and find our tribe:

  • Moving to California. We were born, raised, and are just Californians at heart. Living in the DC area has been a grand adventure – but we are not, and never will be, the Alphas of the world.
  • Reconnect with some of those friends we’ve lost touch with. Life gets busy, and once we are less busy we can put more effort into those relationships we unwittingly let slip away.
  • Actually talking to people I’m surrounded with doing things I love (reading group, writer’s corner, community yoga, museum talks, etc.).
  • I count my sisters and parents among my best friends. Being able to see them any time I want will bring me enormous amounts of joy.
  • Meeting people through volunteer work, FIRE community, Meet-ups, and who knows what else?

In today’s environment, I have actually slipped around the backside of my house and went in through the window to avoid a chatty neighbor. I suspect, if I’m planning to try to make more friends in retirement this is not the way to go….

~ Mrs. Moe

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